So, if you live in Indonesia and live in an environment which the majority is moslem, I bet you are flooded with breaking-fast-together-gathering thingy around this time, especially if you have a lot of friends/organization. I have only through this trend for like three years but, yeah, I am fed up with this. I even try to avoid it all because hey, what's so fun about that? Well, it's pointless unless it's your true squad.

I just had one several days ago and it was, meh. It's supposed to be my former class gathering but all I got is only a bit chit-chat with my former close classmates--not everyone--and that's all. Oh, don't forget the eating part tho which is just a normal eating session. After eating? Everyone leave, of course. There's an after party which I somehow got into but hey it was the only fun part I had that day because former crush my friends were there.

The point of me writing this is: what is the point of gathering if you don't have enough interaction with each other?

Sometimes I just wanted to be asked out to have a date with someone. Actually it's creepy if you never knew him especially here, in Indonesia, where nowadays every relationship began with massive chatting 24/7. But I just want to try it out.

Actually, I once failed my first date with my crush (which I thought would work but meh). I was so nervous and thanks to the chatting thingy I kind of run out of topic and ended up as a dumb girl not being able to say anything. It was so awkward and what made it worse was: the guy I went out with is also a really quiet guy if you didn't know him that well. Disaster. Really.

This post is pointless (as always) but I always dreamed about having a cute shoujo-manga like date.

Things like waiting him to arrive in some meeting point instead of waiting at home, hoping he would appear soon with his motorcycle/car. Holding hands and talking while walking from the meeting point to the date spot instead of seating awkwardly in his motorcycle seat hoping your chest won't bump into his back.

That's way more romantic and cute and intimate for me. Well, sure you can chat if it's in car but really, nothing beats walking hand in hand while blushing when you meet each other gaze,

Ah, too bad I live in Indonesia.

They are fooled by Asmodeus, they can't think straight.
Lured by Asmodeus, they ate the bait.
They aren't even a thing.
But they devour it without knowing.

A lonely rabbit, craving attention and warmth.
A hungry wolf, satisfying hunger and curiosity.

They reap what they sow.
There's only lust without love.
A rose without petals, only rotten thorns.


Dear Asmodeus, did you enjoy your feast?










PS: I listened to JC Chasez's Schizophrenic while writing this. It was a bunch of sensual and erotic songs (lol) yes, I enjoy it and you should too ;)

Hello people, this is going to be a really unimportant post, please bear with me okay.

Started from buzzfeed video about NSYNC vs Backstreet Boys, I instantly gone into nostalgia. I really liked NSYNC and I took the moment to re-watch their music video again. Not like the other time, I went further now and I watch EVERYTHING that's related to them. That made me fall into them deeper, especially into this guy called JC Chasez.

You don't know him? Please google it so you know but please don't fall in love with him too because he is mine. Yeah I know he is hot af and cute at the same time but don't you dare.

I have always had a crush on him but this time, it's massive. I drive myself crazy for him ((if you get the joke here, you're da bomb)) I even imagined what if turned out he is my future husband (lol) but that won't happen right.

Actually isn't this weird, girl around my age usually likes 1D or 5SOS but instead, I like NSYNC which debut was before my birth and even went hiatus before I could remember anything. But, who cares lah, they are great. Super great that makes you think boy group this days are trash (sorry not sorry).

Okay.
That's it.
Thanks for reading this.
I love you all.

Have I ever talked about love here? A lot I guess (lol)

Idk why I'm writing this now maybe because I just saw this gurl posting a really romantic candid photo with my ex on instagram (lol). And you know what, he still blocked me like dudeee????

I realized, I have never been in love, for real. It was only curiosity of mine. Most of the time I date someone it was out of curiosity. Like, I'm wondering how it would feel if I had any relationship with this guy,

I can't really say I'm in love, I always wonder about my feeling and always ask to myself whether it's love or not. Fun fact, I made my first boyfriend (now an ex) cried because of this. Funny, huh?

I have always been fond of cute-vanilla type of romance story, but I've never been in one. Probably because of my personality. I can't believe in such a vague thing such as love. There's nothing such as pure love. It only exists in a really naive imagination or fiction.

Love is a pain.
Loving someone will bring you suffer.

No pain, no gain, huh?